For the past few weeks I have been feeling hot & cold all the time which is off and on. I’m hot, then cold, hot, then cold. I have also had bad days where I do nothing but sit in the bathroom and have diarrhea. Like now, My hands & bottoms of feet are freezing while my cheeks are burning. i have checked my body temperature multiple times (My school has as well) and it is normal. i am hot natured, but not like this. I am on antidepressants but the dosage has not been changed since December. I really do not want to go to the doctor (In fact I will NOT) if they have to do a blood test. i am deathly scared of needles. My ex-psychiatrist had ordered a thyroid blood check last march (which came back normal) and I STILL have the bruise from it. You can see it plain as day under my eczema. i am thinking I may have picked something up from my extremely unclean school(It’s old, unkempt, and under sterilized). I have to go there, my parents say, there is no changing out of this over academic school(I can transfer but I am guilt tripped into not doing so. Also- It is a high school).
I also have Bi-Polar disorder (And possibly SAD- Seasonal Affective Disorder). And, I don’t know if this is relevant or not, but because of the stress & frustration over my grades (We’ve had snow days so they **** horridly)- when I get yelled(more like screamed) at for attempting to “stamp my feet” I begin smashing my head into the wall has hard as I can. I have also been slapping my self & punching myself in the head for acting like that because I need to be punished. The effects of this have caused swollen lumps and even worse-er headaches that go on for days(instead of for hours like normal as a side effect of my non working antidepressants).
I am supposed to get my progress reports later on today(It’s Tuesday where I am & I just can’t sleep because of the hot/cold flashes) and I know I am going to have to come home to extreme disappointment from my father(He dosen’t care if there have been snow days or not, he expect straight 100/A’s every time). I don’t want that look.
Anyways- what could be causing these hot/cold flashes?
I will NOT see my doctor because my mom said he’ll have to do a blood test(Now she hasn’t practiced medicine in decades, I think she is saying this because she dosen’t want to A-get up off her lazy bum and take me[Shes dosen't take me when i am sick anyways{Not even to my therapy appt.'s} *NOTE: She has depression* and B- have to hear the never ending complaining of my father about not taking me to school.{He sends me sick or not. I remember going with a fever and the chicken pox in kindergarten}).
I am supposed to being seeing an adolescent psychiatrist instead of the adult one I was seeing(Whom was of no help at all, I only saw her for literally 5 minutes and was sent on my way. I was left on the Seroquel XR and will run out before the months up), but I can not see him/her till April. My current mood stabilizer(Seroquel XR) has been taken off of my insurance company's medicine list because of the price. They will not allow the pharmacy to fill any more.
I am currently taking-
Pristiq Anti-Depressant (Brand) - 100 MG *It's split into 2-50 mg tablets*
Seroquel XR Mood Stablizer (Brand) 150 (This is the one I will run out of before the end of the month)
Apri Tab Birth Control- .15 mg, I take only the active ones has my periods were so heavy I was passing out and missing school.
And 1 drugstore brand multivitamin (What ever is the cheapest at the time is what my mom buys)
I have tried every mood stabilizer in the book(Except Lithium as it causes blackouts which i am prone too and it ain't fun) with no prevail. Except the Seroquel XR but I was soon taken off of it( for head aches cause by many many parents that were smoking outside while waiting for their kids. There are kids that copy-cat their parents.[You either ride the bus or have a ride]. Oh I had a smile as big as the world, I MISS THAT) to try something else and now that I am back on it I feel like sh– .
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I am sorry if my spelling and/or grammar are off. I tried to read all of my browsers flags words for spelling. I may have missed some, I am only human. Also it’s 2 AM and my head is hurting (Smashed my head Sunday night out of frustration), and this screen is bright. I am also crying and I don’t know why.
EDIT My Guinea Pigs have been helping(I have read they help with those plagued by mental illnesses to calm them down). I also get this frustration(The smashing of my head) right when my family and I are about to leave. My dad rushes us beyond belief creating a huge stress effect on me. And I just don’t have the time to take a few minutes out before hand to sit there with them.
I am seeing a really good therapist(When my mom doesn’t take up the hour I have allotted). Just not a good psychiatrist. I was 1st on the Seroquel XR back in September and felt like I was on top of the world-happy, then switched for a minor headaches to Trileptal, then switched back to Seroquel for sadness. I am completely opposite then i was back in September.
